Are you terrified of Swine flu? Bird flu?

Do you lie awake at night planning for the inevitable zombie insurrection? For the zombie flu?

Are you just ready to move out of your parents' house?

Evacuate Earth is here to help! With our affordable space travel packages, it's easier than ever to pack up and find a beautiful new home on another planet!

Whether you choose First Class, Coach, or Cargo Bay seats, you're sure to have the ride of your life, as our surplus Soviet rockets blast you away from your troubles and to your brand new home!

What's more, you can leave your guilt behind, too! Purchase your ticket now, and Evacuate Earth will donate a portion of the proceeds to Memphis-based charities.